This entry was a pending draft since 15.Sept and published today 22.Sept. Of those whom questioned my absence, here's a response post.
Hey geng. So, it's cloudy outside, and it is too...inside here. *hand on chest. I am so pissed and upset but mostly sad after the result of my upu reapplication was up. I didn't get a spot in any IPTA for this year. I was hoping that I can step in either UKM o UPM for my degree, but unfortunately I didn't make the cut. It was a horrible feeling, knowing that, your only chance to succeed in your life by studying to the next level has reached an exit door.
Frankly saying, I was kinda hoping to excel more than lot of people out there, plus I wanna proof to my family dat I am worth of something more than just a post-dip. Have a healthy competition between my ex classmates that I can achieve what I wanted. Have fun being in my twenties. Study hard, play hard, let loose and let the life plan it ahead of me.
Indeed, life already planted a fate on me. Not cool.
It's not easy. Let alone my dip's path. So many obstacles, ups and downs, it's just surreal. It was a DAMN TIRING THREE YEARS. 3 years of dealing with problems, dealing with people, dealing with what the Uni life would have to offer you. Dealing with so many issues, the pros and cons, the sad and happy moments. GOLD. It's not unpleasing, but life never promise to be smooth and clean. Who had ever a life like that? But remember, that life is worth it. It's worth the try, worth the effort, the sweats and blood, the memory is GOLD. You can't buy them, it needs to be earn.
In my despair hour, I would like to thank Allah, He knows what came into my mind right after I received the upsetting news.
suicide? I would like to thank Aidiel for being such a supportive friend. Eventho we never met, but he's such a nice young man. He wrote THIS to ease me up. Thank you a billion Aidiel. :)
You know...those sayings like never give up, there's always something better for you the next time, and yadda-yadda. Those are DEFINITELY TRUE! I just have to put a little faith in myself, Allah, and what have written for me. I quote this from Aidiel's entry.
I remember my teachers' saying back then when I was in high school. Tho I couldn't remember the exact wording, but here's the idea of her most inspired words.
When the road seems tough, and your feet all sore.
And the debts are high, though the funds are low.
When you can only sigh, just move slow.
Have faith and trust, and get a grip.
Rest if you must, but never you quit.
If it was written that I do not belong to any IPTA this year, who said that I can't be for the next year? Anas...DO NOT GIVE UP HOPE! Allah is always with those who have faith and keep being patient. To comfort my own heart, and your reading. Here are some quotes, suitable for this post.
And the answer for the typical phrase, If life throws you a lemon, make a lemonade. :)
No worries, as for today, my emotion has regained stable. :) Ta sedih2 da, in fact I have one major news to share witcha guys. Tunggu jelah k.